Urban Cowboy

Anyone see anything out of the ordinary in this picture?

The other day I looked out my window to see 8 neighborhood guys ride by on their...horses?

Honk if you love Jesus...

I didn't mean to....

I went to Michael and Elizabeth's wedding a few weeks ago. Elizabeth was about to throw the bouquet. I made up my mind that I would not catch it, especially not after I accidentally caught at my sister's wedding. Then, before I even knew what was happening, I was flying through the air and the bouquet was in my hand. I had immediate catcher's remorse. This WILL NOT happen again!

Congrats Michael and Elizabeth!

ATM: Arm Twisting Machine

Dear Wachovia ATM creators,

We would like to make you aware that not all of your clients drive SUVs. The height of your ATMs have required us to use awkward card retrieval techniques which result in back pain, neck injury, fingernail breakage, and bad emotions. If this issue is not resolved at once, we may have to file a lawsuit for vehicle discrimination.

Thank you for your time,
Compact Car Drivers of America

Danger: Earbuds

Thursday in class my students shared something fun/interesting/crazy that they did over Christmas break. This is my favorite, shared with his permission :)

One young man, whom we will call "Tito," was listening to his iPod. When he removed his earbuds, the squishy part stayed inside his ear. He could not get it out! His solutions, in order:
1. Tried to pull it out with tweezers (did not work).
2. Went to bed because it was late and he would figure it out in the morning.
3. Dad used a VACUUM cleaner to try to suck it out (did not work).
4. Finally went the hospital to have it removed (did work).

Once upon a time there was a guy named Josh...

Facebook status to start the story :"Joshua David Stockment will never again do trish jackson a favor. At least the back of the police car was air conditioned."

And this is his story in his own voice:

Ok -So Trish asked me to feed her dog/let it out this evening because she had to stay late at the school. When I showed up her roommate's car was in the driveway. So I thought: Maybe her roommate is home and I don't have to do anything. So I knocked on the door but there was no answer. I called Trish to see what to do but she didn't pick up. After doorbell/knocking again and no answer I walked around to the side and unlocked the door. But when I opened it there was no audible alarm noise so I thought: Sounds like her roommate IS home. Obviously I didn't want to be unlocking the house and walking in on her, so I quickly locked the door. I called Trish and didn't get an answer, called C-Robb to see if she knew anything about the situation. As I was hanging up the police showed up. The alarm got set off, but it didn't make any warning noise when I opened the door and it didn't make any noise when the actual alarm went off.

When the police showed up I was walking in the side yard looking for a phone signal because Sprint sucks and I have to chase half a bar around. He frisked and cuffed me and put me in the back of his car. After walking around the house and deciding that things appeared to be normal he came back and questioned me. I told him what happened and that I had no indication that the alarm went off [and that I had a key and the alarm code]. He said that I was too articulate and thorough in explaining the situation. So he asked me to describe the inside of the house, took the handcuffs off me and had me open the house and prove that I was supposed to be there. Once convinced that everything was alright he left.

I took the dog for a short walk and fed it. 30 minutes after I got home and about an hour after the ordeal with the police Trish called and said that the Alarm company just called and said the alarm was going off at that moment. So I raced back to the house to make sure that I set it properly when I left; I had and everything was fine. And that was my excitement for the day.

Plumbing 101

My toilet was leaking. A friend suggested that maybe it would be possible to fix it on my own. So I went to Lowe's and got the part....only $2.87. Only, we couldn't get the old part off the put on the new one (the screw was corroded....see below for our creative attempt at uncorroding). So now I may have to pay a plumber to fix it. Sad!

Toilet fixing tools: screw driver (check!),
wrench (check!), flashlight (check!)....cotton balls?
Coca-Cola? Paint scraper?

Plumber Josh, sporting his www.ilikeandy.com shirt.
I don't know that Mr. Osenga would appreciate this type of publicity!
Or would that be "plumbicity"?

Moral of the story, if you can't fix a toilet, at least come up with creative ways to TRY to fix it so you can make a mess, take pictures, and have a funny story later!

PS: you may perhaps want to bring a nose plug!

Are you serious??

One of my students brought this into class today!
Yes, it is a poptart!

Pretty Handwriting

I learned a very helpful phrase yesterday :)

If your friend asks what you think of a guy/girl, and you want to say that they are a nice person, but maybe not that good looking, you can say "Tiene bonita letra," which means he/she has pretty handwriting.

You might be NACO if....

....you ask for a to go box at a restaurant!

I went to an Italian Restaurant with my friends Karla and Quique last night. My ravioli was so amazing that when I didn't finish it all I was forced to ask for a go box....oops! This is a no no if you want to be a FRESA and not a NACO.

louiecris

Louie the cat's new look
Created by manager Bryan W. Cook
(http://bryancookart.wordpress.com/)

why did the turkey cross the road?

Traffic got a little backed up
today on Gilead Rd.

Riley's Big Day

Riley is having a special visit to the vet today.

He has had a rough week.....on Wendesday, he had his first bath after coming home caked in mud. He was probably in a fight. The vet called him a thug.

To Riley!

bad kitty!

The other night I was grading some papers when I heard something that suspiciously sounded like a cat in a trashcan. I got up and walked over to find Riley, with his hiney sticking up in the air and his nose in the garbage. As I prepared myself to scold him, he popped his head up......except, I couldn't actually see his head because it was stuck in a sour cream container. I had to laugh! I will save the scolding for the next time and perhaps learn to take out the trash a little sooner.

ode to padme

one day
she went away
without a coat
without a note
into the cold
she was quite bold
to leave from home
now free to roam
i miss her purr
and her soft fur
kitty cat!
please come back
unless, of course,
you're some dog's snack...

"neeeeeeigh"bors

So, I am moving towards the end of July. I am excited about being in a new place, but sad about losing some great roomies. You have to meet my new neighbors, though...I think they might be great company!

Meet Mr. Horse, whose name I do not know, and Patches and Puddles the goats, whom it seems I have interrupted from their morning breakfast of hay and coffee.

not betty crocker

I am a little grumpy.

The other night I went to a fellowship dinner with some ladies from my church. Everyone brought these yummy recipes to swap. So, tonight I decided to try my hand at making a yummy desert that we will just call "little oreo balls of delight"...there are only three ingredients and seven easy steps: grind oreos, mix with cream cheese, roll into balls, chill 1 hour, melt white chocolate, dip balls in the chocolate, cool.

Simple right? Not for Trish....I can't even melt chocolate!!!! I think I might have over melted it (aka burned it)....it never got to the point where I could actually dip something in it.....or maybe it was past that point....I DONT KNOW....i dipped the oreo balls in, and they fell apart as I was trying to cover them in chocolate....all I was left with was "little balls of disaster" and no fun christmas treats for my friends.

I am bummed. I don't like white chocolate anymore. I don't like oreos. And I don't like cooking!

little miss distracted

So, I just opened up my freezer and what did I find? A frozen roma tomato....no I'm serious...a tomato!!! The other day I was making a salad and I thought to myself, "hmmm...I like my tomatoes cold...I should put it in the freezer a few minutes." Somewhere between getting out the lettuce, putting on the cheese, and adding some yummy balsamic vinagrette dressing I forgot about my tomato.

And that brings us to today when I was looking for some chocolate. No chocolate in our freezer, just a bright, red, frozen tomato. In fact, I dropped it on the floor....ya know...just to see what would happen....nothing! Just a ice thunk on the floor. So we played a little frozen tomato soccer and then tried to tempt the cats into playing with us.

The sad thing is that I don't just forget about tomatoes. The same night I left the tomato in the freezer I left chicken in the oven. I was baking some chicken to use for sandwiches later that week. Luckily, my roommate, who came home at 9:30-3 hours later-decided to make some food for a work party. She found the chicken and saved us all from a potentially fire-y death.

And then this morning, I woke up and I realized that I forgot I was supposed to play in a softball game the night before. GRRRRR....How does this happen?!

The sad thing is that I don't just forget about silly things. I forget about important things....like trusting God...and loving my friends and family well.....about knowing who I belong to.

I am grateful that God does not forget.

Lord, help me to remember....who you are....what you have done, that I might learn to trust you and love you more.

Psalm 105

1 Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name;
make known among the nations what he has done.

2 Sing to him, sing praise to him;
tell of all his wonderful acts.

3 Glory in his holy name;
let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice.

4 Look to the LORD and his strength;
seek his face always.

5 Remember the wonders he has done,
his miracles, and the judgments he pronounced,

6 O descendants of Abraham his servant,
O sons of Jacob, his chosen ones.

7 He is the LORD our God;
his judgments are in all the earth.

8 He remembers his covenant forever,
the word he commanded, for a thousand generations,

Wierd Cat Lady!

No! I am not talking about myself. Ok, so I have this neighbor. I drive down the road and she is watching her cat taking a potty break.....I get closer and the cat is on a LEASH....ummmm....who does that?

Got Milk?

Got Milk? Aaron Burr

Ok, I am taking this online class, and someone in the class brought up this old GOT MILK? commercial...Enjoy! And don't forget the MILK!