ATM: Arm Twisting Machine

Dear Wachovia ATM creators,

We would like to make you aware that not all of your clients drive SUVs. The height of your ATMs have required us to use awkward card retrieval techniques which result in back pain, neck injury, fingernail breakage, and bad emotions. If this issue is not resolved at once, we may have to file a lawsuit for vehicle discrimination.

Thank you for your time,
Compact Car Drivers of America